In our daily life, we have always met people who tell lies plenty of times. They make excuses and try to cover up the truth. Well, it can be many reasons- helplessness, gregariousness or a situational demand.
It is said that an honest person can’t survive in a corporate world. Therefore, every time he/she has to put his moral ethics at stake. There can be many reasons for telling lies.
Possibly, their boss possesses the character of a dictator or of dominating nature. Moreover, social pride and peer pressure are considered as the major factors in telling sequential lies. Therefore, they tend to form a cobweb of lies.
According to a 2002 study conducted by the University of Massachusetts, 60% of adults can’t have a ten-minute conversation without lying at least once.
Here, I have incorporated a guide to avoid lies and liars.
How to identify that person is lying?
The basic trick is to observe the expressions of the people. It is said that when a person lies he/she seems to avoid eye contact.
Therefore, avoiding eye contact is directly proportional to the nervousness.
Secondly, out of nervousness, their verbal speech becomes the biggest hindrance in the communication. That is why it leads to fumble or fret. Usually, people lose the track of communication when they feel nervous in telling the true fact.
Thirdly, body language is a good indicator to know about lies. You can identify a person lying when they are shaking their leg or scratching their head, leg or cheeks. Although they do it because of nervousness but their doing is dependent upon their lies or truths.
You all find it quite interesting, the fourth one. You all must have across with people who try to make excuses or find ways to avoid a certain kind of situation. Indeed, Changing the topics is the only way to identify the liars. People at times are so much indulged in their pond of thoughts that they think of changing the topic at their own convenience, despite knowing the fact that the other person will identify it.
How lies can be told
However, there are at times you feel bad when you tell a lie. It seems that you have betrayed yourself. Self-guilt is a natural phenomenon, however, one can analyse the quantity of a lie which is being spoken. Therefore, self introspection is a light in the deep black tunnel.
Confession box: You might have heard about a confession box in church. A place where you can share anything related to any sin. Similarly, at your home you can make a confession box and put your chits into it by writing down your sins or lies. It will surely loosen the burden of guilt from you.
Accepting your mistakes by writing it on a note: The best way to become white collar is to accept your lies. Although communicating the problems is also a best way out to solve the problems in order to show your emotions. But at times it is better a note when feeling burdened of guilt or regret.
“… I stole a bit of gold out of my meat eating brother’s armlet. The brother had run into a debt of about twenty five rupees. … And the debt got cleared… But I resolved never to steal again. I also made up my mind to confess it to my father. But I did not dare to speak. Not that I was afraid of my father beating me. … I was afraid of the pain that I should cause him. I decided to confess my guilt through a written note and asked for an adequate punishment.”
(An excerpt from My Experiments with Truth)
Well, this is how Mahatma Gandhi tried to put words of lies in a written form and told the truth.
Telling lies have become a habit of our daily life. Moreover, we sometimes forget how we have improved the degree of stating lies. This is how we move towards a two-face-masked character or a personality and tend to avoid our real image in order to live in a virtual world.
However, to avoid a bigger lie, we can always make our efforts towards avoiding our first big lie.